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Communication Skills: Watch for Flooding

Consult A Therapist Series

Have you become overwhelmed during an argument or intense conversation and can't think straight? Do you ever regret what you said in a fight? You're probably experiencing flooding. It's a physiological response to emotional overwhelm. There are parts of your brain that you can't use when you're flooded. Seriously!

In our next video in our Communication Skills for Relationships series, couples therapists Stephanie Gross, AMFT and Rebecca Williams, LMFT discuss the clues that you are experiencing flooding and what to do about it when it happens. HINT: sometimes the best thing you can do is take a break and come back to it later.

Watch for flooding:

  • What is flooding? - Flooding is an overwhelming, negative, emotional experience where we can’t communicate effectively any longer

  • When do we get flooded in relationships? - We most often feel flooded during conflict with our partner

  • What should we do if we feel flooded? - We should pause. Take a step back. Scale our feelings. Take a deep breath.

  • Talk to your partner about what it’s like to be flooded when you are calm.

  • Positive mental image - Keep a positive memory of you and your partner fresh in you mind to access when you feel flooded so you remember to love them and that they are not the enemy

Was watching this video a homework assignment from your therapist?

Put this skill into practice before your next session. We’ll want to know how it went. If you had great success, we’ll celebrate with you. If implementation was rough, we can help you figure out what went wrong and get you back on track.

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